What I Learned from My Patients

I recalled the winter of 1985 in Shanghai vividly. I was finishing my medical residency, and it was freezing that year. Since Shanghai was just south of the Yangtze River, according to the central government's policy, all territories south of the river received no heating in the winter despite the snowy weather.

There were no gleaming new buildings that most people would associate the city with, but those arrived in the 1990s. Dilapidated 100-year-old buildings sat sparsely lit without heat. We were still rationing food, and fuel was scarce. Making my hospital rounds with a puffer jacket underneath my white lab coat made me look heavier than I was. Patients were crowded in their beds, weighed under heavy blankets, eight to a room with curtains in between for a tiny bit of privacy. 

When I approached each bed, the patient would immediately sit up, reach their hands, shake mine, and thank me for my visit. I remember one patient was recuperating from abdominal surgery, while another was undergoing chemotherapy for leukemia, and yet another just had spine surgery. Everyone had severe problems they were dealing with, and naturally, they were in the hospital. 

However, every patient took time and told me their life stories, introduced me to their family members who visited, and asked me how I was and about my family with genuine concerns. Often, their family members would bring me fruits, which were hard to come by in winter, or food they had made. I became part of the family of many of my patients. 

I recounted in my rounds that there were 20 rooms just like this one on each floor of the six-story hospital building. The hospital housed nearly a thousand patients. Thank goodness I was only responsible for a fraction of the patients. There was another connected annex building with the ER and ORs (operating room), specialty treatment centers, and an outpatient clinic with a massive integrative pharmacy on the ground floor, with drugs and herbs, dispensed side by side. 

At the outpatient clinic, where I would spend two days a week during my residency, there was a cavernous waiting room where patients would start lining up at 6 am. By 7 am, when the doctors would start their day, there would already be several hundred people waiting patiently for their turn to see their doctor.

There was no appointment-making unless you were well-connected or some higher-up official. You just waited for your turn. No one made a scene, and regularly, people offered to give up their position in line to others who were elderly, appeared sicker, or were more fragile than them. It also helped that medical costs were a fraction of what it is in the United States. 

It's interesting for me now to reflect on my experience from so long ago. Despite my workload of over a hundred patient encounters daily, I never tired of seeing the next patient. I never stayed in bed, not wanting to go to the hospital even when I didn't feel well, nor did I ever doubt the role of my chosen career path. Why? Below, I share what I learned from my patients at the beginning of my career. What I learned has sustained me to this day. 

Compassion for Others and Self

I chose the healing profession, even though you can say that it was my destiny to become a doctor because of my family's medical lineage. But it was because of my near-death and recovery experience I felt the calling to help those in need. However, the constant reminder from my patients to take care of myself made me realize that I could not sustain my lifelong mission unless I were compassionate towards myself and self-care. Doctor, heal thyself! Whatever purpose calls you, self-care is the ultimate expression of self-compassion. 

Gratitude Instead of a Right

The difference between the rich and developing nations of the world regarding healthcare is that the modern West's denizens expect healthcare services as a right or entitlement, while the people of developing countries are grateful for what healthcare they receive. There's no question that even in the West, we have much to improve in our healthcare system. But it is the one thing we should never take for granted.  

Every single day, healthcare workers are on the frontline fighting to save another life, often under challenging conditions and are often not appreciated. They are unsung heroes. Over the years, my family members, including me, have had to access the healthcare system. Each time, I made sure to let everyone know how much I appreciated their efforts, from the receptionists to the nurses, from the kitchen staff to the doctor. 

The Heart Connection

I'll be frank—1980's Shanghai was dirt poor. Hospitals were not well equipped, and the buildings were falling apart, aside from not having central heating during below-zero winters. However, the medical care was excellent. The doctors, nurses, pharmacists, and everyone who was part of the care team were there for one reason—they cared about the patients and were good at their jobs. Patients got well, went home, and returned to their productive lives. 

It made me realize that it's not the fancy buildings that healed people, it's not the latest and greatest medical instruments that cure disease, and it's not the big pay package to some renowned doctor—because we had none of that in Shanghai and across China at the time. The staff connected with the patients, healers who cared about their patient's well-being, and a system that did not bankrupt someone for getting sick. Patients would visit, year after year, not for health purposes but to express gratitude. The healthcare personnel had become part of the patient's extended family. 

During this holiday season, let us all be thankful for the health that we do have, or if we are undergoing treatment for a condition, have gratitude for those involved in your care. Focus on having compassion for yourself and make time to relax, rest or cook a healthy meal. Reach out and express appreciation to those who have contributed to your health and well-being.  

Don't send cookies or sweets—that will cause more reasons for dieting, LOL! Instead, a card of heartfelt handwritten thanks and perhaps a donation to your favorite charity to help those less fortunate is more than enough. After all, a loving heart is what heals and what humanity needs, now more than ever. 

Wishing you health, peace, and joy!